Archives for November 2017

If You’re Having A Bad Day…

Sometimes, life throws us periods and episodes of hardships and obstacles that seem as though they’ll never end.

We’ve all been there.

And yet, we are still standing! Despite those days and chapters where it feels as though we’ve been assigned our own personal rain cloud, our own individual histories can show that its always a matter a time before the sun breaks through the clouds again. Despite how many times we’ve been stepped on or kicked down, our relentless and resilient roots hold us firm and in time, we come to blossom again.

And often, we return as a greater force.

If you are currently spiraling in one of your life’s slumps, this message is especially for you.

Whatever it is that you’re experiencing in this moment, no matter how uncomfortable, frightening or painful it maybe, you’re ready for it.

A much older and wiser friend once told me that the Universe only gives us what we need to evolve… we are sent the people and circumstances necessary to receive lessons we’re prepared to decipher. Your capability and power is a collection of all accumulated moments of your life.

Do not underestimate your power to overcome this.

Believe in your ability to rise above your adversities and to meet yourself on the other side of obstacles and resistance as a new deeply lived you.

Take a moment to look back on your life lived thus far. Reflect and search for a time or moment in your life where you felt as if it were you against the world. What was the outcome? How did you grow from it? What lessons did it present?

How did it make you stronger?

With each peak of the mountain of life you are presented with an opportunity to navigate hardship with more skillful means and tact. With each summit ascended you are called to determine how to cause the least pain and suffering, both for yourself and others.

“You’ve been assigned this mountain to show others it can be moved.”

Just as others have embodied and modeled strength, earnest effort and the capacity to overcome, you conquering this storm creates ripples for others to witness and have faith in their ability to persevere.

As you know from past triumphs and surviving the rough patches, it’s often the most difficult moments in life that teach us the most. Savor the lessons. Breathe in this moment. Open your heart for self-compassion and kindness.

Find acceptance and spaciousness where the mind otherwise tries to create resistance and unnecessary suffering.
Mahalo,

Alyse

“I would like to beg you to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart, and to love the questions themselves as though they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you wouldn’t be able to understand them. The point is to live everything – live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday, far into the future, you will gradually, without even knowing it, live your way into the answers.” -Rainer Maria Rilke

How To Not Take Anything Personally

Many of us grew up hearing the phrase

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”

I recall hurling this defense at the response of cruel words of bullies and schoolyard tormentors, not truly realizing the impact of removing their power and satisfaction of bringing me down.

But despite the immediate refuge this saying would often provide, the verbal daggers to which it was drawn would still sometimes linger and cause hurt.

I’m sure many of us can relate and recall moments in our lives where the words of others caused us pain and suffering. These painful memories can make mastering the art of not taking anything personally, more often than not, easier said than done. But with earnest practice nourished by an ever-growing confidence and self-love, let me reassure you it’s a path worth pursuing.

By embracing these truths and understanding, you are one step closer to cultivating immunity to the projections and judgments of others.

1. We are All Mirroring

Everyone is living in their own world, their own dream and reality.

And the sooner you realize others interactions with you is solely based on their point of view, a relative truth, the sooner you’ll become immune to their judgments, pointed fingers, rejections or disagreements.

When others treat me in upsetting or disagreeable ways, I remind myself that their actions are merely a reflection of their own beliefs and not a true assessment of who I am.

The more we recall that everyone is simply projecting their own subjective perception of reality and truth, the more we can deny perceptions of ourselves that are not aligned with our value and worth.

2. Let the “Dogs Bark”

Meaning you can’t change what people are going to say. Let them them talk. Choose not to listen.

Just as the old childhood rhyme suggests, remember that you always have a choice… the choice to not let the words and attitudes of others’ to hurt you and in doing so, refuse to drink their emotional poison.

When we take something personally, we accept another’s reality as our truth, neglecting the fact that the offender has no true understanding of what we live, navigate, hope and know of.

Stand confident in yourself, knowing of your immense worth in the face of those who gossip about you, put you down, and use their words to hurt others.

3. Live to Your Own Standards

Close your eyes and picture a life where you granted yourself the personal freedom of living only to your dreams, expectations and standards. Envision yourself actively choosing a life driven and shaped by your desires, passions and dreams alone. In this fantasy, you make no room for the fear of disappointing others’ expectations of your life.

In this dream, you abandon all fear of what others’ will think of your path and choices.

This is the ultimate personal freedom. And it is all within your reach to practice each and every day. When we give ourselves permission to live our lives to how we see fit, embracing the knowing that we are the only one to live it… not your parents, your friends, your lovers, but you… you are empowering yourself as the best suited captain to sail your own ship.

4. Making the Fantasy a Reality

Perhaps you’re thinking to yourself, “But I’m too sensitive. I feel vulnerable and deeply impacted by assessments from others.”

Most of us do.

As you cultivate this habit, you will learn to not take what others say to heart. You will replace your trust in the words and actions of others with a deepened trust in yourself, making the careless comments or actions of others easily swept from your view.

Grant yourself this ultimate gift of personal freedom. Live by your own definition of what your life is and who you are. Don’t take anything personally.

Inspired by Don Miguel Ruiz’s “The Four Agreements.”

Mahalo,

Alyse

How To Care For Your Mind And Body During The Work Day

Consider incorporating these simple but GAME CHANGING practices into your day to day to better care for your mind and body when on the grind.

Take a Walk

It’s no surprise that physical activity increases productivity and creativity. So skip the break room and breathe in the fresh air and feel the sunshine on your face. Reclaim your breaks as a time to rejuvenate and recharge.

Relax Your Eyes

With so many of us using computers at work, computer eyestrain has become a major job-related complaint. Studies show that eyestrain and other bothersome visual symptoms occur in 50 to 90 percent of computer workers.

To reduce the effects of constantly focusing
on your screen, look away from your computer at least
every 20 minutes and gaze at a distant object (at least 20 feet away)
for at least 20 seconds. Looking far away relaxes the focusing
muscle inside the eye to reduce fatigue.

Also, be sure to unplug during your down time. Instead of scrolling through your news feed or Instagram photos during your lunch break, give yourself a genuine break by stepping away from your devices. Your eyes will thank you ☺

Stretch

Desk jobs encourage us to do one of the worst things for our body: sitting still. While it may feel awkward stretching at your desk, your muscles, joints, and bones will thank you for the variety.

  • Stand up and down, using no hands.
  • Replace your desk chair with an exercise ball keeping muscles engaged all day while maintaining balance.
  • Shrug your shoulders high up towards your ears. Hold. Breath. Release. Repeat this three times.
  • Shake your head yes and no.
  • Shake out your hands.
  • Release tension in your arms with air circles.
  • Stretch your arms around yourself, hands reaching for your shoulder blades and squeeze!
  • Leave a golf ball under your desk to roll under each foot, one at a time.

Dedicate yourself to making small steps towards your goals each and every day.

Mahalo,

Alyse

Creating Your Reality Through Mastery of Words

Our words are like spells. Each word we utter carries a frequency, a vibration that attracts and propels according to its intention. We often disregard the immense power we possess in our words.

Words and language are the tools we utilize to seek and define meaning to what we experience in life. We can either use this to our advantage, creating a tangible paradise and heaven on Earth in our day-to-day, or to our disadvantage, consumed by a hell-like perception.

You are the creator of your reality.

Your experience in life is formed by how you choose to react to the rising and falling circumstances you navigate. You can either choose to use words that cast a negative projection onto your situation, or you can tell a story of awe and appreciation, radiating positivity into whatever circumstance you encounter.

Say it’s raining on a day you wanted to go to the beach.

You can either be dissatisfied by this situation that is out of your control and say:

“I hate that it’s raining right now”

Or you can focus on the positive:

“I can’t go lay out, but I can read a book or invite some friends over to
hang out and have fun here instead.”

The Story You are Telling Yourself
The words we use have the potential to be detrimental to our quality of life or supportive of our greatness in evolution. Assess the words and story that you use to define yourself.

Do they nourish your growth and feed your potential, or do they hold you back and leave you feeling less than others?

Where did you receive these messages and why do you give them power?

The way we use words to shape our own self-image has tremendous impact on how we navigate the world. Choose a story that celebrates your individual beauty, unique talents and capability to achieve greatness. Build a collage of words that builds you up, not breaks you down.

Skip the Trash Talk

Gossip not only invites a negative charge into our emotional field, it also enforces a sense of separation and superiority to others. This nourishes the ego that feeds off of resentment, cruelty and arrogance, qualities that drive us further away from others and ourselves, leaving us only in isolation.

Gossip also tends to be self-fulfilling, as talking badly about others can often conjure negative and rapid repercussions if the person you speak ill of chooses to respond to your unconscious remarks.

Have you ever been on the receiving end of someone speaking poorly of you?

Have you felt betrayed after learning one of your closest friends has been making fun of you?

If we can learn anything from being subjected to other people’s misuse of words to cause harm, is to not subject others to the same treatment.

Use words that uplift and inspire others. You have a choice to drag others down or support them on their path. Choose words that go to the heart.

“Speak only the speech that neither torments self nor does harm to others. That speech is truly well spoken. Speak only endearing speech, speech that is welcomed. Speech when it brings no evil to others is pleasant.” –Samma Vaca

The Drain of Idle Chatter

While we all may have different standards of idle chatter, we can all relate to participating in conversations that are foolish or mindless. These kinds of dialogues rarely hold our attention and leave us drained after fighting off daydreams or other mental formation preoccupations that distract our ability to stay alert to what’s being spoken.

The stark contrast is the kind of talks that invigorate us, leave us feeling motivated to take action and often, deeply connected with those we are fostering the dialogue with.

What is the quality of these conversations that make them so powerful and moving?

It’s the content in which they speak of.

Imagine if all the words you spoke were binding like a contract. If you were held accountable to uphold the words you speak, would you choose them differently?

Say what you mean, and dream as a means to accomplish your visions.

If we only spoke of the things that hold great significance in life, we’d likely have a lot more silence in the world. And perhaps that wouldn’t be a bad thing.

In the absence of trivial chit-chat, the room for spirit-nourishing conversations will blossom.

Shape Your Reality with Positive Language

Often I receive messages from individuals asking how to be more “positive”. They tell me they hope to one day be as “confident and positive as me.”

This is your first step.

The single most transformative thing you can do in your life to embody the positivity, vibrancy and joyful existence that you are so worthy of living is using the power of your words to actualize that reality.

Speak skillfully. Think accepting, gentle thoughts towards yourself and others. Banish negative self-talk or judgmental dialogue towards others.

Allow room for speech to flow through you that ignites inspiration in others. A single kind word from you can uplift and shift the energy of all those you interact with.

Your words can change the world.
Mahalo,

Alyse